You’ve seen examples of those bumper stickers and tee-shirts that say things like “Divers do it deeper” and “Pilots do it in their sleep” ad nauseum… and when we read them we, being of dirty mind and jealous body, think the “It” refers to S-E-X. Or maybe we don’t think it does, but we know it could, and that’s what makes us smirk.

Well I would like to suggest a new tee-shirt. Inspired by the now infamous Duggars – they of the TLC channel’s documentary, and unlikely heroes to other like-minded procreators the world over. Surely they have done enough to put NW Arkansas on the map to deserve a tee-shirt. There are certainly worse things for a state to be known for… an embarrassing literacy rate and median income, a University athletic coach scandal, home of Billy Bob Thornton… oh, wait. DOH!

I’ll be on pins and needles trying to guess what their new progeny’s name will be. All of their children to date have been given names beginning with the letter J. I’m thinking, though, with number 17 on the way (due in June!), their selection is running severely thin if they don’t want to dip into foreign names. In fact, a cursory search on AmericanBaby.com pulls only three suggestions with American origins – one is a musical genre, another the name of a certain superhero’s father, and the last is the name of a rock ballad supergroup from the 80’s. I don’t know the Duggars personally, but my guess is that none of those suggestions would fly with them.

So, go Jim Bob and Michelle! Populate the world with your “Heritage of the Lord” and teach them to be caring and respectful and spiritual people. More power to you!! And I’ll wear my homemade salute to you with only the smallest of smirks.